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Parents, do you know what your kids are doing on Facebook?

Original post made by Anon Parent, Another Palo Alto neighborhood, on Apr 18, 2008

This is not advertizing for Facebook, but at the urging of a fellow parent, I joined Facebook to find out what my kids were doing there and I was very surprized. I had to get their permission on line to become their facebook "friend" but when they had given me permission, I had access to all the information they have there and not only their's but their friends' too! I think this is a great tool for them to keep in touch (they have met up with old best friends from elementary days) but I don't think they know just how far this information goes and it never goes away.

So, I urge parents of teenagers to do likewise, not to spy on their kids, but to join with them in using this. You never know, you may meet up with some old friends of your own.

Comments (9)

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Posted by Another concerned parent
a resident of Another Palo Alto neighborhood
on Apr 18, 2008 at 11:12 am

Sounds to me , Parent, you are some kind of pervert trolling for young kids on Facebook.
I suggest your information be turned over to the PA police.

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Posted by Anon Parent
a resident of Another Palo Alto neighborhood
on Apr 18, 2008 at 12:48 pm


The fact that I have access to their friends' pages is not what worries me. I truthfully have not looked at them. What bothers me is the information they are giving to anyone who looks there. Any "friend" has access to their name, address, email, cell phone, birthdate, etc. Also, through links to their friends, you can find out about parties they are attending, and other what I would call private stuff. By me being able to see it, I can talk to them about what others can find out about them. I certainly don't call this being a pervert and I don't call it trolling, remember, I had to ask them if I could become their "friend".

In this technological age, the kids use technology more than we do. We are more cautious (hopefully) than they are and we should be giving them guidelines on what is OK and what is not. Do you realise that kids at middle school have pages here? This is good stuff if kept so that private stuff remains private, but for many of our kids, this is not the case.

And, as for looking for young kids, you are way off track. I have made contact with at least one of my past friends from my teenage years and hope to meet more.

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Posted by julie
a resident of Midtown
on Apr 18, 2008 at 12:55 pm

Every parent should closely monitor their child web activity until they are 18yrs of age.

Children should not have access to FaceBook etc until they are 18 yrs it is just too dangerous.

Every should realize that any and everything they put on such sites is permanent, search able by others and not confidential at all

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Posted by Anon Parent
a resident of Another Palo Alto neighborhood
on Apr 18, 2008 at 1:00 pm


Whereas I do think you have a point, you are really being a little unrealistic. These kids are getting onto Facebook at school, at friends houses, at the library, and so on. Rather than telling them they can't do something which they are likely to do behind your back because it is the cool thing and everyone is doing it, I feel that it is better to watch them inside the system.

I don't know the age of your kids, but unfortunately the system is against us old fogeys. If your kids are middle school and higher, don't be surprised to find out that they have Facebook or MySpace already and just haven't told you. Did you know that all high schoolers have their own email address from school and middle schoolers have passwords to get into their own stuff at school (like InClass). The days of forbidding them are over.

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Posted by julie
a resident of Midtown
on Apr 18, 2008 at 1:12 pm

Facebook or MySpace etc should be held legally liable if they allow access to their sites by kids under 18 without their parents explicit permission.

You cannot self alcohol to minors nor cigars,

The same principals will apply to risky website

For parents it is simply a matter of exercising your parental authority.

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Posted by Walter_E_Wallis
a resident of Midtown
on Apr 18, 2008 at 2:33 pm

I told my 10 year old grand-niece that one rule was to never erase anything, and to show her mother whatever she was watching.

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Posted by julie
a resident of Midtown
on Apr 18, 2008 at 3:23 pm

Well- at least we do not have this problem-- YET

COMMERCE CITY, Colo. — A couple fighting about which gang their 4-year-old toddler should join caused a public disturbance that resulted in the father's arrest, Commerce City police said Thursday.
On Saturday, Joseph Manzanares stormed into the Hollywood Video store where his girlfriend worked, threatened to kill her and knocked over several video displays and even a computer, Commerce City police Sgt. Joe Sandoval said.After he ran out of the store, police were called and the 19-year-old was arrested at his home.

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Posted by Student
a resident of Palo Alto High School
on Apr 18, 2008 at 7:27 pm

I agree with many of you on this topic, students are too open with personal information. But I would like to point out that even though many parents ban their students form facebook/myspace they are going to do it anyways.

Also, julie, why hold Myspace/Facebook liable for what your children do?

If your kids put information on their web page and add some creeper/stalker/pervert/rapist, then I must say its their own fault.

Like this comment
Posted by julie
a resident of Midtown
on Apr 19, 2008 at 3:42 pm

>>>>Also, julie, why hold Myspace/Facebook liable for what your children do?<<<<

Because they make money from their business, if a store sells beer to an underage person they are liable.

The situation is no different, it is easy for these sites to deny access
to minors, and they have a legal and moral obligation to do so.

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