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COUPLE'S NET

"Everything has a Crack. That's How the Light Gets In." Leonard Cohen

Our marriage is not perfect; our partner can not fulfill all of our needs (yet may fill many); our children are not the reflected best aspects of ourselves -- and...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Apr. 8, 2014
There are no comments yet. 266243 Views

COUPLE'S NET

7 Do's and Don'ts For Staying Connected as a Couple During Grief

My heart goes out to the families and friends of the young people who have died in our community lately. It is shocking and saddening beyond words. I specialize...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Mar. 10, 2015
Last comment by Stephan Bashkir, on Mar 30, 2015 at 1:43 pm | 8 comments | 224718 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Today is Yesterday's Tomorrow

Aside from being questionably deeply philosophical, there are practical considerations for couples in this statement. "I'll work on our marriage tomorrow."...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Mar. 24, 2014
There are no comments yet. 144365 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Grief and the Holidays

All the hubaloo around Christmas and New Year celebrations can be so painful or irrelevant when we're grieving the death of a loved one, a loss of a relationship,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Dec. 9, 2013
There are no comments yet. 75232 Views

COUPLE'S NET

"5 Sex Languages" and Three Categories of Sex

There’s a new book called 5 Sex Languages by Dr. Douglas Weiss that I think will be helpful to couples. The five sex languages are: Fun; Desire; Pleasure;...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Apr. 21, 2016
Last comment by Curmudgeon, on Apr 21, 2016 at 11:04 pm | 1 comment | 69318 Views

COUPLE'S NET

"If You Don't Know, You Know: No"

I read this quote recently (and don't remember where; sorry, author), and it hit a nerve with me. How hard is it to say "No"? Pretty difficult for some of us,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Mar. 17, 2014
There are no comments yet. 67879 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Love is Sustained by Action; a Pattern of Daily Devotion

"The Five Magic Hours" (from Dr. John Gottman of the 'Love Lab' in Seattle) is for those of you who are busy: - Two minutes every morning, eye contact, kisses...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Apr. 4, 2014
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on May 29, 2014 at 5:09 pm | 2 comments | 62337 Views

COUPLE'S NET

For Thanksgiving, Come Write Thanks to Your Beloved (e.g., Thanks for warming up my feet every night.)

I don't think anyone can be told too much how s/he's appreciated. So in honor of Thanksgiving, a wonderful holiday of family, friends and food, let's give thanks...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 19, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Dec 19, 2013 at 9:04 am | 3 comments | 61797 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Neuroplasticity: Ask for a Change

I've been writing a lot recently about looking at ourselves and making changes in our own behavior (which is in our scope of influence ). I know some of you are...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 11, 2013
Last comment by starting with the man in the mirror, on Nov 11, 2013 at 12:08 pm | 1 comment | 56289 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Love Means Having Someone to Lose: Engineers Not Exempt

Formula 1 race driver and World champion Niki Lauda reminds me of a lot of Silicon Valley engineers I've met. I saw the movie 'Rush' a few days ago with my teenage...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 14, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Oct 15, 2013 at 5:00 pm | 2 comments | 54538 Views

COUPLE'S NET

The Valley of Heart's Delight

What is now Silicon Valley was originally known as The Valley of Heart's Delight for its concentration of orchards, flowering trees, and plants. Until the 1960s...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 4, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Nov 5, 2013 at 2:04 pm | 4 comments | 51860 Views

COUPLE'S NET

"What Did You Do?"

On a recent warm fall afternoon, I notice a man riding his bike with a huge mixed bouquet of flowers in his basket. I watch as he turns north from Willow onto Middlefield,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 28, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Oct 30, 2013 at 8:28 am | 2 comments | 51485 Views

COUPLE'S NET

A World Series Example: Be Explicit

Game one, second inning; St. Louis's Wainwright pitching, high pop up. Looks like he signals that he'll catch it. Catcher Molina comes running up, but defers to...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 23, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Oct 25, 2013 at 9:11 am | 4 comments | 50957 Views

COUPLE'S NET

"I" Statements that are Actually "You" Statements

No, that's not a typo. I hear these a lot when I encourage partners to use "I statements" or to share how s/he is feeling. Here are examples of what to...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 16, 2013
There are no comments yet. 50701 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Here Come the Holidays: Get Couple-Ready

While this may be a time of family, love, thanks, giving, cheer, good food, and relaxing around the fireplace with good friends, it also may be a time of stress,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 30, 2013
There are no comments yet. 50282 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Devices are Definitely Not Sexy

They may look sexy, but they are a turn-off to your partner. S/he looks over to give you a "Hey, how about it?" look, and you miss it completely because you're looking...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 1, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Nov 4, 2013 at 8:15 am | 2 comments | 50177 Views

COUPLE'S NET

In-laws to Love, or In-laws from Hell?

I fell in love today. It was not with my husband (this time). It was with a Macintosh computer. It happened once before; I can barely remember the year: it was a...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 17, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Feb 25, 2014 at 8:12 am | 3 comments | 49649 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Go Ahead, Have a Fight

Many disagreements come about because we don't understand our partner's intention, and s/he does not anticipate the impact that action or behavior will have on me....

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 21, 2013
Last comment by Martha, on Oct 22, 2013 at 1:46 am | 3 comments | 49418 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Tips, Experiments, etc.

If you're like me, and most people, your first answer to what is missing in your relationship is to look at what your partner is or isn't doing. And it's certainly...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 7, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Nov 9, 2013 at 9:27 am | 2 comments | 49015 Views

COUPLE'S NET

From Crazy in Love to Love of My Life

When we were courting (yes, I know that's an old fashioned word), we were on our best behavior without any effort. We were trying to win over our beloved. S/he was...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Oct. 8, 2013
Last comment by Chandrama Anderson, on Oct 18, 2013 at 9:12 am | 9 comments | 48983 Views
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