Entertain these thoughts/ideas, let them rumble around inside you for a while. Experiment.
“Don’t believe everything you think,” I tell my clients.
Listening to your partner, saying back what you heard, and offering empathy is not the same as agreeing. It’s letting your partner know you heard him/her, that you care. When the time is right, you share your perspective, and s/he listens, says back what you said, offers empathy. It’s quite simple, and revolutionary.
When you have a disagreement, argue each others’ point of view. See what you learn. Seek and consider previously unthought-of options.
The goal is not to think alike, it’s to think together.
Bring realistic and constructive thoughts and words to any disagreement, especially with yourself.
Be curious, ask questions, seek new thoughts and feelings.
When you’re struggling, reach out for help. When another is struggling, reach out with support. At times it’s best to ask what s/he needs right now (vs. fixing). Other times a kind word, a sincere question, a hand on the shoulder, sitting together in silence or with music, or a walk together is your valuable offering.
As humans, we entertain an uncountable number of thoughts in a day. Seek ways to entertain positive thoughts, even, or especially, in the midst of trying times. When negative thoughts arrive, witness their presence and watch them float away on a cloud.