Premarital and Couples: Marriage Maintenance | Couple's Net | Chandrama Anderson | Palo Alto Online |

Local Blogs

Couple's Net

By Chandrama Anderson

E-mail Chandrama Anderson

About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ...  (More)

View all posts from Chandrama Anderson

Premarital and Couples: Marriage Maintenance

Uploaded: Jul 26, 2019
According to research by Dr. John Gottman, who runs the "Love Lab" in Seattle, most couples wait an average of six years from the time they sense issues in their relationship before they seek help! Yikes! Who would wait that long before taking their car in to the shop?

By the time couples get to marriage counseling there are three basic scenarios:

1. Both people want to stay in the marriage and work through their issues.
2. One or both partners are not sure whether they want to stay together.
3. One person wants a "safe" place to tell their partner the marriage is over.

The question truly is not "if" you need couples therapy, but "when." Life has a way of throwing you curveballs. If you've been practicing dealing with them together, you stand a much better chance of staying together, happily.

Good marriage counseling can be for working out deeply seated problems, to going in for a tune-up or "detailing," or for anything in between. What are the top things couples struggle with? Sex, money and power.

Having an existing relationship with a marriage counselor is a good idea so you know who to call when you need one. For your sake, for your partner's sake (and your kids if you have any), please take care of your marriage before its muffler is dragging.

There are some great books for marriage maintenance, too. You can see the list on my website: www.connect2.us.com
We need your support now more than ever. Can we count on you?

Comments

There are no comments yet for this post
Sorry, but further commenting on this topic has been closed.

Get fact-based reporting on the COVID-19 crisis sent to your inbox daily.

Coronavirus Food Safety Update + New! Insider Tips
By Laura Stec | 7 comments | 5,191 views

Singapore's oldest cafe was about to open in Palo Alto. Then, the coronavirus hit.
By Elena Kadvany | 1 comment | 4,434 views

A Pragmatic Approach to A Trillion Trees
By Sherry Listgarten | 4 comments | 4,116 views

Repairing a Disagreement with your Beloved & “Physical” vs. “Social” Distancing
By Chandrama Anderson | 2 comments | 2,780 views

The University of California’s flexible policies during COVID-19
By John Raftrey and Lori McCormick | 6 comments | 2,695 views

 

DEADLINE EXTENDED

The 34th Annual Palo Alto Weekly Short Story Contest is now accepting entries for Adult, Young Adult and Teen categories. Send us your short story (2,500 words or less) and entry form by April 10, 2020. First, Second and Third Place prizes awarded in each category. Sponsored by Kepler's Books, Linden Tree Books and Bell's Books.

Contest Details