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Toddling Through the Silicon Valley

By Cheryl Bac

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About this blog: I'm a wife, stay-at-home mom, home cook, marathon runner, and PhD. I recently moved to the Silicon Valley after completing my PhD in Social Psychology and becoming a mother one month apart. Before that, I ran seven marathons incl...  (More)

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Yes, we leave the house

Uploaded: Jan 17, 2015
Some new parents choose to stay home with their newborns for days/weeks/months. I prefer to get out, even if it is only to run a quick errand.

As a new mother it is very important to rest, but it is also important to take care of yourself. For some that may mean staying at home. For me, it means getting some fresh air, interacting with others and changing my scenery.

When you leave the house with two kids under three, others sometimes stop to say hello and smile. Many hold the door open for you and comment about your hands being full. I assume that some are remembering back to when they were juggling two kids themselves. And I am very thankful.

However, I've also been stopped and questioned about why I am taking my newborn out of the house. These types of criticizing questions were harder to address as a first time mom. Now that I am a second time mom, I know the easiest answer is to just say that my pediatrician says it is OK. There is no need for any additional explanation.

Yes, it can be a challenge to take a newborn out of the house, especially with a toddler. But it is also OK.

It's hard enough for parents with a newborn to get out of the house some days. Is it really necessary to try to make them feel guilty when doing so?

What comments were easier for you to address as a second time parent?
What is it worth to you?


Posted by Mother of 4 , a resident of Palo Verde,
on Jan 17, 2015 at 9:46 am

Staying at home with a newborn is a luxury few even stay at home moms have.

With my first there were some health issues for baby which meant a trip to the hospital lab for blood work on a daily basis for the first 10 days or so. With subsequent newborns, I had to get my toddler(s) out to the park as soon as I could for both our sanities - even after a C section. Cabin fever is something that I would have suffered if I hadn't ventured out as much as possible.
Living here even in winter, getting a toddler out to the park is not as much effort as it would be in colder/wetter climates. I fortunately had a friend with young toddlers in walking distance, so many of my outings were with the stroller and the toddler on a tricycle.

It is down to personality and priorities. I made the effort to get out because I wanted to and yes because I needed to keep my routine as normal as possible, particularly fitting into kindergarten routines. I also had to.

It is funny, I remember after my last baby, my mommy support groups were great bringing meals, etc. for a couple of weeks and I really appreciated that. But within a week of being off the list of needing meals, I got a phone call asking if I could deliver a meal to the family of the next baby that had arrived in our group. So yes, less than a month after the baby's birth, I was delivering a meal to another family with a newborn.

They don't stay newborn for long!

Posted by Cheryl Bac, a Palo Alto Online blogger,
on Jan 17, 2015 at 4:57 pm

Cheryl Bac is a registered user.

Mother of 4- Yes, we are very lucky to have the mild California weather. It's so nice to have ability to head outdoors for a walk or park outing on almost every day. And to not worry about getting little ones into coats, hats, gloves, etc.

I agree, I was amazed by the support we received from other moms who were either very pregnant or who had also recently become mothers of 2. It's wonderful to have a network of friends going through similar life transitions.

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