Devices are Definitely Not Sexy | Couple's Net | Chandrama Anderson | Palo Alto Online |

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By Chandrama Anderson

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About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ...  (More)

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Devices are Definitely Not Sexy

Uploaded: Nov 1, 2013
They may look sexy, but they are a turn-off to your partner. S/he looks over to give you a "Hey, how about it?" look, and you miss it completely because you're looking at . . . your device.

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 +  Like this comment
Posted by CrescentParkAnon., a resident of Crescent Park,
on Nov 3, 2013 at 1:03 am

Is there a point there?


 +  Like this comment
Posted by Chandrama Anderson, a Palo Alto Online blogger,
on Nov 4, 2013 at 8:15 am
Chandrama Anderson is a registered user.

Yes, there is a point. I am told by men and women on a daily basis that they feel ignored/unseen/unheard because their partner is looking at his or her device -- a lot, every day. They are missing the cues that couples (and people in general) need for communication that come from conversation, eye contact, gestures, touch, and so. Online content can be interesting (and of course the irony of this interaction being online does not escape me), but the truth is that we need human contact and interaction. Neuroscience shows that our brains are wired for this in order for us to thrive. (See Harlow's study on monkeys for research, if that interests you.)


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