Victim of bullying needs help!
Original post made by CE BULLYING IN PAUSD SCHOOLS on Mar 16, 2012
If you have questions or want to help, email me at at this address firstname.lastname@example.org Sign the petition at
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Bullying happens at schools, but some kids are perfect targets such as special needs students. These students usually keep the bullying to themselves because they are afraid to tell, embarrassed or because people do not believe them, or they might come to the point of feeling like nobody cares, as it happened to my daughter.
My daughter, a special needs student in Seven Grade at Jordan Middle School, has been bullied since fourth grade. Because of this, she has become suicidal two times after being called "fake Mexican, and after she was called derogatory names such as retarded, stupid, ugly face, and after she knew that a child asked other kids not to hang out with her because she is different. Luckily we the family have been able to get her emergency help on time, so she still alive. Next time we might not be so lucky. When the bullying became unmanageable, she went into depression. My daughter has been punched on the face, thrown hard on the ground to the point of being taken to the nurse office on a wheel chair.
The times my child and I have asked the schools for help, I have been told, that perhaps she is looking for it, that they cannot guarantee that it won't happen again, that there was not a recorder to see if the bullying occurred so they cannot believe her, that she had a crush on the kid who bullied her, that she probably misinterpreted it, but can a child misinterpret a punch on the face, or hearing some calling her retarded and stupid? It is time to stop making excuses for the bullies and protect the victims.
It is time to adapt strong policies and an effective anti-bullying program across school district to stop bullying, and to give serious consequences and counseling the aggressors so they stop bullying. Tell Dr. Skelly, Palo Alto School Superintended and Charles Weis Superintended of Santa Clara County Office of Education, and school board members to STOP THE BULLYIN NOW across the district and protect all students, but specially students with special needs who cannot speak or stand up for themselves, and to form an anti-bullying task force. Thanks for signing
on Mar 17, 2012 at 12:04 pm
There are legal venues for dealing with the physical abuse you have mentioned. You need to get legal advice about your rights. For example, there are situations which are illegal like someone making threats on the basis of religious, sexual orientation or race (I think). At Rutgers, a student has recently been found guilty of such crimes, and for illegal stuff, with law enforcement you directly hold the perpetrator accountable. Physical abuse or other threats covered by the law need not be in the school's domain, you call the police, your daughter dials 911.
For the subtle, under the radar bullying, there are no excuses for the behaviour of kids who bully. However, the schools are your best hope. It's well known that those who bully are in need to feel superior about themselves, and they prey on easy targets. The schools are equipped to work with this, and you can be in the school office every single day until they help. I encourage you to continue to work with the schools.
As a former victim of a serious bullying situation, where our school worked with us in the most positive and professional manner, I can tell you that even after everything that could possibly be done was done to help, it was still an untenable situation and the choice was ours to remove ourselves from the school.
It was not a victory of the bullies for us to leave the school. It was because it allowed our child to have a change, a fresh new outlook, and to avert more emotional dealings with the charged atmosphere in the school. Dealing with the bullies and their families was like a full time job.
I am not saying that changing schools is a choice for all bullied, and that bullies be left to continue bullying. I am just saying that you need to consider this possibility. There are two other Palo Alto middle schools. The district should be able to help you change.
on Mar 17, 2012 at 5:58 pm
Thanks for your advise. I have tried everything. Thanks for taking the time to replied and your advised. I am glad that moving to another school worked for in your case. I know that homeschooling will end the bullying, but then it she will not have the chance to socialize, and she will feel like she is punished for having a disability.
on Mar 18, 2012 at 5:57 pm
If your child was bullied "since fourth grade"?
I have dealt with bullying at Jordan Middle School administration three times. Once was to report an incident that my child witnessed. Twice was to advocate for my children. All involved physical and verbal altercations. The Jordan administration was completely professional and immediately stopped the bullying and the students were disciplined. Anti-bullying was a priority for the last Jordan principal, Michael Millikan, who left last year and is now director of secondary education in our district office. You might contact him for help.
This is not an inner-city school district. I find it completely unbelievable that your child went in a wheelchair to he nurses office from physical abuse and the administration did nothing to the perpetrator. When there is physical abuse, it's definitely an issue that administration can address. Sure, there is going to be mean words spoken by girls in middle school - my daughter has to deal with it. But if you have major incidents or racial bigotry to report or names of students who are repeatedly targeting and seeking out your child, administration will deal with it.
Here is my advice, since you are asking for help:
- Have witnesses report the bullying to Jordan administration. They will keep the witness names confidential. Just a parent and student complaining is less plausible.
- When speaking to administration, be professional, respectful, and keep your emotions in check or you sound like a crazy woman. No one will want to help a hysterical person who is badgering them and telling them what to do.
- Leave Jordan since you live in Barron Park and Terman should be your middle school. Or did you already leave Terman?
- Sell your house/take the extra cash/move elsewhere and send your child to a small, private school (there are plenty of private schools around).