Original post made by WeddingExpense on Jul 9, 2007
Going by the bay area prices, my co-worker thinks that this is a very wise decision. However, his wife, who had been looking forward to a modest wedding, is disappointed to some extent, though she sees reason behind the decision.
Personally, I thought this was a very sane decision! I have been to weddings in Saratoga hills; Monterey Bay - where the wedding must have cost $50K at least, if not more ! Yes, all of us had a good time, we all admired the flower decorations, the food and other such things. However two weeks down the line, the memory was for a 'fancy party' and nothing more.
Every bride wants this day to be special and wants it to be memorable. The wedding industry is huge and I am sure they are not going to support such radical thinkers :)
We spent $1000 on our wedding - we got married and had lunch with friends and family at a good restaurant (yes, and my friends called me cheap! - we couldn't afford a major festivity; we didn't want our parents to spend their savings on this)
What do you think? Is it worth spending spending so much on a single festivity? If yes - why; if no - why ?
on Jul 9, 2007 at 12:47 pm
I agree that a wedding is important, but definitely not a splashy affair.
When we got married we put money into what we thought was important. The clothes were on the modest side, the food was good, plentiful, but not spectacular. The flowers were adequate and my mother made the cake but we had it professionally decorated.
What was important for us, was the occasion to get family and friends together, to give a lot of them time to celebrate with us, but almost as importantly, to give them time with each other. We had several different groups of family and friends who had not seen each other for sometime and it was good to let them enjoy being together.
One thing we did spend money on and was worth it, was a good photographer. It wasn't just for the moody/glamorous wedding shots, but for the memories. We had pictures taken with lots of our friends and that made them feel more special and gave us some pictures. I almost think we could have spent more money on this and sent everyone souvenir pics.
Anyway, I do think a wedding is a time to celebrate and a time for get-togethers, but I do not think it needs to be a time for outdoing everyone else (I went to one friend's wedding and the food was a potluck and it was a great party). The only other time families get together is for funerals and I would rather have a wedding any day rather than waiting for a funeral to get us together.
on Jul 9, 2007 at 1:05 pm
My parents told me that if I want to get married, they would suppport a very small party, following a courthouse official ceremony. The "party" was a very small affair in their backyard. They also said that if I could achieve a succesful marriage, and still be married at the end of ten years, they would throw a big party.
I was more than a bit dissappointed, but they were right. I have been married 40 years now (three great kids), still with the same husband. That ten year party was GREAT! It was so much more meaningful to me, because I thought we had achieved something.
on Jul 9, 2007 at 3:49 pm
A nice wedding is something to remember, but the amounts of money spent on these are nuts. Clearly anyone can have a nice wedding much more frugally. I do agree, don't skimp on the photographer, and delegate someone to take amateur snaps as a backup.