Alison Pill (left) and Lindsay Lohan in "Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen"
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
This review should have been written by one of the credulous 11-year-old girls for whom the movie was made, as they certainly enjoyed the screening more than I did.
At the risk of tsk-tsking and finger wagging: If Disney Pictures is looking to pander to the lowest urges of emerging girlhood, they have succeeded in this tacky and boring after-school special. The film's message is that it's OK to sink to the selfish motives of the meanest girl in your class, provided you get saved by the one good girl at the very end -- and you still get the lead in the play, the cute boy and the gorgeous rock star thanks you for a great night in the city in front of all your friends. You can be as spoiled, deceptive, destructive and bratty as you want, as long as you finally say you're sorry. The end of civilization is upon us.
Lindsay Lohan ("Freaky Friday") plays Lola, a transplanted New Yorker in a New Jersey suburb. She befriends Ella (Alison Pill, who gives an interesting "best friend" performance -- the film's sole emotionally authentic character) because they are both wild over rock band Sidarthur. Lola gets the lead in the school play (a rock version of "Pygmalion") over mean alpha-girl Carla (Megan Fox), and the pals engage in hi-jinks to get Ella's protective parents to consent to their going into Manhattan for a rock concert. In an occasionally witty portrayal, Carol Kane plays the batty theater director.
"Freak Friday" was so much more fun, "Clueless" so much more delightful. This is just snide, cynical, jarring and adolescent, with nary a redeeming feature in sight -- except that the whole thing isn't very long.
Rated PG for mild thematic elements and brief language. 1 hour, 29 minutes.
- Jim Shelby