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I really do. My lovely MIL is at the tail end of treatment; I’m her advocate with the docs and nurses and insurance company. My husband is a survivor, too, and the memories of his treatment and recovery are easily triggered. Friends and clients, my sister’s beloved when they were 16, a courageous young woman . . .

People say cancer can teach us what’s important in life and change our focus or direction. F*** that! Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t, but it still sucks.

My grandma, Anne, her sister, Libby, and my mom all had breast cancer ? and survived it. My mom finally succumbed to lung cancer in 2003. My grandma lived to 90, and died of old age, and Libby just turned 98! A friend’s spouse beat the 1% odds of survival. So I know cancer doesn’t take every person it hits.

As I’m writing this, I hear my anger and frustration. I hate for people to suffer. And they do. The patients suffer, along with their caregivers, and loved ones.

Cancer is this greedy, invisible, invading scourge. Ugh.

AND, I mostly see in people that have cancer and those who are caring for them: grace, a “Let’s take care of this” attitude, an occasional snit, strength and fortitude.

Love well, live well, and get check-ups.

Gotta go, I need to schedule my annual mammogram.

About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple,...